1. A chest crossover involves:
a) Two weighted pulleys pulled together until your hands cross in front of your chest
b) A man wearing a brassiere
c) A one-armed dumbbell movement where you lie down and pull a dumbbell over your chest
d) A push-up where you clap after each rep

2. An exercise ball:
a) Requires that your date be a delightful debutante
b) Is used to push out of the balled-up fetal position
c) Is an effective way to stabilize the abs while doing crunches
d) Is an opportunity for a tasteless joke about testicles

3. The Abductor Machine:
a) Is a polygraph machine for kidnappers
b) Works the lower abs while secondarily hitting the upper abs with a crunching motion
c) Improves the muscles of the hip abductors by widening your legs against resistance
d) Was the machine they used in A Clockwork Orange so that Malcolm McDowell’s tear ducts wouldn’t force him to blink

4. A T-Bar:
a) Has a gooey chocolate center and a hard shell
b) Is another word for the lat bar because your body forms a T at the lowest part of a lat pull
c) Is a row where you lean at a 45-degree angle to work the thickness of the lats
d) Takes many lawyers several times to pass

5. A Smith machine (you knew we’d get to this one):
a) Allows you to spot yourself without a partner
b) Made blacksmiths’ lives easier in colonial times
c) Is an effective biking machine because you move your arms as well as your legs
d) Adds rubber band resistance in lieu of free weights

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